I feel like I can't even bring myself to write about my life. Like somehow putting it to paper makes it more real -- too real. I am lost with no way out. I am stronger than I think & dumber than I give myself credit for. Where am I trying to go from here? I don't really have a clear picture of what I want. How am I supposed to manifest my own destiny if I can't get past immediate gratification?
I want to lose weight. So why do I keep cheating on my best chance? Why am I not more angry at myself for cheating?
Do I want out of this relationship or can I stop duffering in it?
i don't know.
