Recently I received an e-mail that tickled me exactly the WRONG way. I'll post it first and then post my response below. Please feel free to comment!! (I apologize ahead of time for some of the language I used in my response, but I'm fairly passionate about this -- it _is_ my country and my home!)
---
The original e-mail:
I am Canadian: The new version...
I AM CANADIAN
I am in the minority in Calgary, Vancouver, Toronto, and every casino in this country.
I was born in the forties, fifties or sixties, yet I am somehow responsible for some First Nations people being screwed out of their land in the 1700's!
I pay import tax on cars made in Ontario.
I am allowed to skydive and smoke, but not allowed to drive without a seat belt.
All the money I make until mid July must go to paying taxes.
I live and work among people who believe Americans are Ignorant... These same people cannot name their own country's new territory.
Although I am sometimes forced to live on hamburgers and don't have a pot to piss in, I sleep well knowing that my taxes helped purchase a nice six figure home in Vancouver for some unskilled refugee.
Although they are unpatriotic and constantly try to separate... Quebec still provides most of my nation's prime ministers.
95% of my nation's international conflicts are over fish.
I'm supposed to call black people African Canadians, although I'm sure none of them have ever been to Africa for that matter.
I am being told that paying a 200% tax on alcohol is fair.
I am also being told that the same tax on gasoline is also fair.
Even if I have no idea what happened to that old rifle my Grandfather gave me when I was 14, I will be considered a criminal if I don't register it.
I am being told that spending $15 billion to promote the French language in the rest of Canada is fair when the province of Quebec doesn't support or even recognize the ENGLISH language.
I am being told that paying $1 million for 3 Stripes ('The Voice of Fire' painting in Ottawa) by the National Art Gallery was a good purchase, even though 99% of this country didn't want it or will ever see it.
When I look at my pension and realize that I take home a third of what I actually make, I say 'Oh well, at least we have better health care than the USA.'
I must bail out big corporations who drive their business into the ground and say, 'yeah that's ok.'
And when they move all their manufacturing plants and jobs to a third world country and say, 'no problem.'
I must fork over my portion of the 11.5 million dollars to show the Queen of England and her family a good time visiting in my country even though I can't afford to visit the province next to me.
My National Anthem has versions in both official languages.
Canada is the highest taxed nation in North America, the biggest Military buffer for the United States, and the number one destination for fleeing terrorists.
The Lord's prayer is not allowed in our schools anymore because of other religions who chose to move here.
I am an angry white person.
I am one pissed off taxpayer, who is broke.
I am Canadian !!
---
My response:
Yay! Being Canadian means something to me, what does it mean to YOU?
1) I was with you until you went and made yourself look ignorant by mentioning casinos .... way to go!
2) Cultural genocide happened as recently as 1936 in this country, and still continues in contemporary ways, maybe you should get a clue? [ let me point out a direction to start: http://www.danielnpaul.com/IndianResidentialSchools.html ] .. then there's always the great Japanese Canadian Internment .. which was a couple years later [ http://www.lib.washington.edu/subject/canada/internment/intro.html ] .. and did you know First Nation's people were only granted the right to vote sometime in the mid 60's ... ? I don't know what this 1700's BS you're talking about is, but get CURRENT!
3) ride a bike?
4) and how would you like to word this petition and have 10,000 people sign it "We the people do not want to be forced to wear a proven life-saving tool, instead, please hike our insurance rates to cover the extra health-care costs from our chosen stupidity. We demand this RIGHT to choose."
5) Gee, if you exaggerate one point by this much, its not likely I'll ever think you will exaggerate any other points, right?!
6) I did a poll of the first 10 Canadians I could talk to readily at this moment: guess what, 10/10 could name Nunavut; guess you need some smarter friends.
7) living on hamburgers is a BAD thing? what? if you can afford some form of protein in your diet, you are eating better than damn near 7/8ths of the world's population! ... and who are you to suggest a new refugee is unskilled? The joke about surgeons and physicists driving taxi cabs in Calgary, Vancouver and Toronto is based in reality - our own government has made it financially improbably for a landed immigrant to port their previous education to our country -- perhaps we should point the finger where it belongs not outwards at those escaping life-threatening living conditions to a better future within our borders.
8) I'm assuming you see the irony in the point you're trying to make with this all on your own, no need for me to bring it to light.
9) and this is a BAD thing why?!!!
10) Since when are you supposed to? I've never met a dark-skinned person from Jamaica who enjoyed being called African Canadian ... perhaps it isn't anything to DO with being Canadian that makes this racial profiling an issue and maybe its a broader issue??
11) no one says you have to drink!
12) and no one says you have to drive!
13) I'll have to research it later when I care more, but I'm fairly sure that firearms older than a certain number of years lie outside the registration laws?
14) Most nations of the world are trilingual, let alone bilingual .. do you not see it as beneficial to the children to learn French? psychological studies have shown that having at least two languages in the brain from an early age can enhance thinking power ....
15) I can't really argue this point, I think $1.8 million for two colours of acrylic is a little mind-boggling, too ... but then, it happened in _1989_ .. are you really still bitching about it??
16) It isn't just health care that is better (that we have it at all is part of it!) .. but we also have better public services across the board. Be thankful of them when you need to access them! and be gracious that you can provide them to those who need to when you don't!
17) If you feel this way - DO something! Don't sit around and write bad attempts at humour on the internets... get out and march in the streets and camp out on the front lawn of parliament hill, collect names, make a stink about it ... petition and lobby for change!
18) I dunno about you, but I imagine there are only so many Canadian Consulates around the world, but if you read the inside of your Canadian Passport, you'll see that bearers of the Canadian Passport have access to every British Consulate the world throughout. I wonder if that's worth 11.5 million? I venture that this is off the top of my head, I'm pretty sure there are one or two other perks that come with out connection to the British "Empire" ... you tell me?
19) This is great, actually. I know it in both -- do you?
20) wait, say that again, Canada is taxed more than the USA and Mexico? really, that's a staggering statistic. I never would have fathomed it in my life. (do I need a sarcasm tag here, or can you hear it loud enough over there?)
21) Ever hear of a guy named Darwin? Don't worry, I wouldn't be surprised if you hadn't. Public schools are non-religious based. Send your kid to a secular school if you want -- you aren't _forced_ to send them to public schools. Besides all of that, the immigrants (you, me, everyone else non-Indigenous) brought the Church to Canada in the first place. Do you know anything about the Medicine Wheel or any other spiritual practice other than Catholicism? Perhaps you should look at _why_ it is no longer spoken in schools, as opposed to hate-mongering on immigrants?
22) Ignorance has a tendency to leave one feeling angry. Get informed!
23) taxes are not the enemy, uninformed voters are! Get informed! Fight the regime :)
I Am Canadian, too .. and I'm damn proud of my country. Now if only we can band together and MAKE something of it, rather than mock it!
---
The original e-mail:
I am Canadian: The new version...
I AM CANADIAN
I am in the minority in Calgary, Vancouver, Toronto, and every casino in this country.
I was born in the forties, fifties or sixties, yet I am somehow responsible for some First Nations people being screwed out of their land in the 1700's!
I pay import tax on cars made in Ontario.
I am allowed to skydive and smoke, but not allowed to drive without a seat belt.
All the money I make until mid July must go to paying taxes.
I live and work among people who believe Americans are Ignorant... These same people cannot name their own country's new territory.
Although I am sometimes forced to live on hamburgers and don't have a pot to piss in, I sleep well knowing that my taxes helped purchase a nice six figure home in Vancouver for some unskilled refugee.
Although they are unpatriotic and constantly try to separate... Quebec still provides most of my nation's prime ministers.
95% of my nation's international conflicts are over fish.
I'm supposed to call black people African Canadians, although I'm sure none of them have ever been to Africa for that matter.
I am being told that paying a 200% tax on alcohol is fair.
I am also being told that the same tax on gasoline is also fair.
Even if I have no idea what happened to that old rifle my Grandfather gave me when I was 14, I will be considered a criminal if I don't register it.
I am being told that spending $15 billion to promote the French language in the rest of Canada is fair when the province of Quebec doesn't support or even recognize the ENGLISH language.
I am being told that paying $1 million for 3 Stripes ('The Voice of Fire' painting in Ottawa) by the National Art Gallery was a good purchase, even though 99% of this country didn't want it or will ever see it.
When I look at my pension and realize that I take home a third of what I actually make, I say 'Oh well, at least we have better health care than the USA.'
I must bail out big corporations who drive their business into the ground and say, 'yeah that's ok.'
And when they move all their manufacturing plants and jobs to a third world country and say, 'no problem.'
I must fork over my portion of the 11.5 million dollars to show the Queen of England and her family a good time visiting in my country even though I can't afford to visit the province next to me.
My National Anthem has versions in both official languages.
Canada is the highest taxed nation in North America, the biggest Military buffer for the United States, and the number one destination for fleeing terrorists.
The Lord's prayer is not allowed in our schools anymore because of other religions who chose to move here.
I am an angry white person.
I am one pissed off taxpayer, who is broke.
I am Canadian !!
---
My response:
Yay! Being Canadian means something to me, what does it mean to YOU?
1) I was with you until you went and made yourself look ignorant by mentioning casinos .... way to go!
2) Cultural genocide happened as recently as 1936 in this country, and still continues in contemporary ways, maybe you should get a clue? [ let me point out a direction to start: http://www.danielnpaul.com/IndianResidentialSchools.html ] .. then there's always the great Japanese Canadian Internment .. which was a couple years later [ http://www.lib.washington.edu/subject/canada/internment/intro.html ] .. and did you know First Nation's people were only granted the right to vote sometime in the mid 60's ... ? I don't know what this 1700's BS you're talking about is, but get CURRENT!
3) ride a bike?
4) and how would you like to word this petition and have 10,000 people sign it "We the people do not want to be forced to wear a proven life-saving tool, instead, please hike our insurance rates to cover the extra health-care costs from our chosen stupidity. We demand this RIGHT to choose."
5) Gee, if you exaggerate one point by this much, its not likely I'll ever think you will exaggerate any other points, right?!
6) I did a poll of the first 10 Canadians I could talk to readily at this moment: guess what, 10/10 could name Nunavut; guess you need some smarter friends.
7) living on hamburgers is a BAD thing? what? if you can afford some form of protein in your diet, you are eating better than damn near 7/8ths of the world's population! ... and who are you to suggest a new refugee is unskilled? The joke about surgeons and physicists driving taxi cabs in Calgary, Vancouver and Toronto is based in reality - our own government has made it financially improbably for a landed immigrant to port their previous education to our country -- perhaps we should point the finger where it belongs not outwards at those escaping life-threatening living conditions to a better future within our borders.
8) I'm assuming you see the irony in the point you're trying to make with this all on your own, no need for me to bring it to light.
9) and this is a BAD thing why?!!!
10) Since when are you supposed to? I've never met a dark-skinned person from Jamaica who enjoyed being called African Canadian ... perhaps it isn't anything to DO with being Canadian that makes this racial profiling an issue and maybe its a broader issue??
11) no one says you have to drink!
12) and no one says you have to drive!
13) I'll have to research it later when I care more, but I'm fairly sure that firearms older than a certain number of years lie outside the registration laws?
14) Most nations of the world are trilingual, let alone bilingual .. do you not see it as beneficial to the children to learn French? psychological studies have shown that having at least two languages in the brain from an early age can enhance thinking power ....
15) I can't really argue this point, I think $1.8 million for two colours of acrylic is a little mind-boggling, too ... but then, it happened in _1989_ .. are you really still bitching about it??
16) It isn't just health care that is better (that we have it at all is part of it!) .. but we also have better public services across the board. Be thankful of them when you need to access them! and be gracious that you can provide them to those who need to when you don't!
17) If you feel this way - DO something! Don't sit around and write bad attempts at humour on the internets... get out and march in the streets and camp out on the front lawn of parliament hill, collect names, make a stink about it ... petition and lobby for change!
18) I dunno about you, but I imagine there are only so many Canadian Consulates around the world, but if you read the inside of your Canadian Passport, you'll see that bearers of the Canadian Passport have access to every British Consulate the world throughout. I wonder if that's worth 11.5 million? I venture that this is off the top of my head, I'm pretty sure there are one or two other perks that come with out connection to the British "Empire" ... you tell me?
19) This is great, actually. I know it in both -- do you?
20) wait, say that again, Canada is taxed more than the USA and Mexico? really, that's a staggering statistic. I never would have fathomed it in my life. (do I need a sarcasm tag here, or can you hear it loud enough over there?)
21) Ever hear of a guy named Darwin? Don't worry, I wouldn't be surprised if you hadn't. Public schools are non-religious based. Send your kid to a secular school if you want -- you aren't _forced_ to send them to public schools. Besides all of that, the immigrants (you, me, everyone else non-Indigenous) brought the Church to Canada in the first place. Do you know anything about the Medicine Wheel or any other spiritual practice other than Catholicism? Perhaps you should look at _why_ it is no longer spoken in schools, as opposed to hate-mongering on immigrants?
22) Ignorance has a tendency to leave one feeling angry. Get informed!
23) taxes are not the enemy, uninformed voters are! Get informed! Fight the regime :)
I Am Canadian, too .. and I'm damn proud of my country. Now if only we can band together and MAKE something of it, rather than mock it!
