Seventh and last "He won't be coming back."

Many times throughout my life the fates have seen fit to smile down upon me. But just as many times they have chosen to point and laugh and laugh and laugh!

It seems, every time I think I've somehow cheated the lines of chaos -- the lines that say nothing is ever really as good as it seems, it comes right back and bites me in the butt, and not in a sensual sort of way!

I thought I had found a local fuck buddy. Or better yet, I thought he would actually be a true "friend with benefits". We got along well, both in the bedroom and out. We had strange things in common and we both were enthusiastic about our enjoyment of each others bodies and skills.

But of course, I speak of this in the past-tense, since we no longer share any of this.

He has moved on.

Apparently, my lifestyle is not something he wants to be a part of. Apparently he can't see himself in a purely sexual relationship.

sigh

I didn't think it WAS purely sexual -- I thought there was a hell of a lot more there than just sex. I was enjoying every aspect of our interactions, so much so that the sex almost seemed like a mere bonus to the friendship I thought was forming.

I guess I was wrong. I guess the sisters of Fate cut short my happiness as easily as a warm knife slices butter.

And to top matters off and make them worse, after two weeks of self-loathing and self-pity, I've met someone else. Someone new. Someone exciting and thrilling and very very stimulating.

This sounds good, you say. How does this make matters worse?

Because Fate is still having a nice chuckle at me.

He lives on the other side of the country from me. This is a big country. He is married with children. And I have morals and scruples that get in the way of that sort of thing.

So I guess I just enjoy the aspects of our conversations that I can get away with from this distance. And bite my tongue when it comes to the other emotions I feel forming in the pit of my stomach and the slick juices that coat the inner of my thighs when I look at his pictures.

Although, a good thing has come from this meeting of the minds -- I feel like my creative energy is coursing my body again and feel very inspired to write poetry again!

So, not all is bad in the world of me! Maybe Fate has something else in store behind all that laughter, after all!